I Swear On My Arse
by SG-Some Guy
Summary: After an attempt on the life of Naruto when he was just five, he meets the Kyuubi. At the same time, he begins his training with Itachi, and is willing to follow him anywhere, even into Akatsuki. Guess what? He's still going to be the Hokage.
1. Chapter 1 : I Swear On My Arse

Here goes at another story...

**Disclaimer : I do not own Naruto... Though I am saving up money...**

Summary : After an attempt on the life of Naruto when he was just five, he meets the Kyuubi. At the same time, he begins his training with Itachi, and is willing to follow him anywhere - even into Akatsuki.Guess what? He's still going to be the Hokage.

* * *

**Chapter 1 : I Swear On My Arse**

_Naruto, Age 1_

It _was _a sunny day in the Village of Konoha. Was. By night fires were ablaze, houses were destroyed and people were scared. So they should be. A demon fox, one so powerful that with one swoop of it's tail could create tsunamis and flatten mountains, was terrorising the town.

"Kyuubi! Have you ever thought about death?" A blonde haired man said, eyeing the beast in front of him. The whole forest had been destroyed because of the great battle going on, and in the middle of the destruction was a man and his giant frog, and an even bigger nine-tailed fox.

"Have you?" Kyuubi replied, his red fur blazing under the moon, giving it the illusion of fire. Baring his large teeth, he let out a laugh. "I am immortal, Hokage-fool! Death has no place for me!"

"Who are we to decide who lives and dies?... Kyuubi-chan..." The blonde nin laughed back, to the annoyance of Kyuubi who was currently plotting to kill the man. "But... I happen to know some one who can decide for us...!" With one last look the blonde nin performed the required handseals, said the jutsu, and a being even more terrifying than the Kyuubi appeared. "COME GOD OF DEATH!"

The giant purple demon, with long white hair and two horns drew its sword from its black robe. The blonde nin didn't even wince as the Shinigami pushed his sword through his body.For a second Kyuubi thought he had won. Technically, he would've been right. But for one who has lived for so long, life isn't usually run by technicalities.

The blonde nin closed his eyes as he felt his soul being stripped away from him, joining the past Hokages. He smiled as he saw his legacy, his son, crying in his makeshift cott.

"Don't cry Naruto... Everything will be much better..." The Hokage smiled, soothing the young boy. The boy stopped his loud crying as if he understood, and just stared at the Hokage wishing him to come to him. As the Hokage left the boy began crying again, but his cries were drowned out by Kyuubi. Kyuubi let out a screaming howl as he felt his body being pulled away from him.

The last thing he saw was a young child bearing the same blonde hair and blue eyes of the man that just cursed him. He winced as he said the final words to the village - "I'll be back!"

The form of Kyuubi disappeared, into the body ofthe tiny baby, as a seal formed on his chest. The giant frog, held the lifeless body of his former master in his hands, before gently laying the body on the ground, where countless nins rushed to. With a poof, and a moment of sadness, the frog was gone - leaving a village of confused people, who didn't know whether to rejoice, or mourn. But one thing gathered from the villagers. The boy must be killed, before the Kyuubi can succeed in his final wish.

* * *

_Narurto, Age 5_

"Please...Stop!" The blonde haired boy managed to say, between hiscoughs of blood, and sobs. He rubbed the side of his bloody head, looking up at his attacker. "Why?" He managed to cry.

"Hit him again!" Another voice called.

"Kill the demon!" More said. The attacker brought down his club again, hitting the blonde boy down, rendering him unconcious.

"Finish him!" The crowd chanted. The man raised the bat again on the five year old boy. Getting ready to swing he brought down the bat as hard as he could against his head. Once. Twice. Three times. All that was left was a blood puddle and a lifeless body. As the man turned away from his dirty deed, he looked back to see something none had expected. His stab wounds started healing, the bruises and scars on his body were gone. He head looked undamaged - but most importantly, the boy got up.

This was a different boy, this boy was the demon they orginally intended to kill. Claws came from fingernails, razor sharp teeth grew, innocent blue eyes turned deadly red, and unlike before, he was ready to kill.

"Which one of you tried to kill me!" The voice growled. The group turned back, raising their weapons to defend themselves. Before either side had a chance to attack a black haired man stood in between the two groups. The demon boy lunged for him, but with a quick movement, the man placed a seal on the boy's head, changing him back to an unconcious boy, and with a jutsu, him and the boy were gone.

* * *

"I cannot believe the villagers would try and pull of a stunt like this!" Sandaime grumbled, shocking the nin in front of him. The black haired nin was holding an unconcious boy, who didn't seem to notice anything around him. 

"It was bound to happen, I apologize for not being able to prevent it sooner..." The nin bowed. "I'm surprised the Kyuubi woke up so early though, he needs supervision, sir, or another outbreak like this could happen."

"Can you recommend anybody who is willing to take in this boy?" Sandaime raised an eyebrow, looking at the young nin before him. He already knew what the nin had planned, but he would rather hear it from him instead.

"Me." The nin said, satisfying the Hokage. The Hokage smiled for a while, twiddling his thumbs. It was a habit for him to play these mental games on his nins, a bad habit from his war times. He breathed, and let out his answer.

"No." The Hokage replied. Before the nin had a chance to ask why, Sandaime gave out his list of answers. "Firstly. You are ten. Secondly, you are only a Chuunin."

"But.."

"No buts. Unless you want to make a deal?"

"I know what I must do..." The black haired nin said, nodding. "I will be his guardian, and I will go to higher ranks! Trust me Hokage, if I don't become an ANBU captain in three years, then I will give up being a nin!"

"Are you sure?" Sandaime raised an eyebrow. "This'll be a first, and ANBU captain is the highest rank... And he will be a big responsibility..."

"It is possible Sandaime."

"You're willing to put your career on the line to take care of Uzumaki Naruto?" Sandaimeasked. "Why?" Sandaime asked skeptically.

"As I was young, they recognised my strength, and started training me to be a monster... I don't want the same thing to happen to him, he could become even worse than me... His power could be made for something good, and anyway,you know what they call me." The black haired nin made a sly smile.

"The Uchiha Genius." Sandaime sighed.

"Not exactly." The black haired nin stretched. "They call me the Itachi, the Uchiha Monster."

* * *

Naruto could barely open his eyes, as he sat on the hospital bed. He strained to remember how he got here, and what he was doing in a hospital anyway. 

_"With my chakra, you'll be out of here in minutes..." _A voice, dwelling inside of Naruto's head said. Naruto was shocked, as he was suddenly transported to a place in his subconcious. Wrapped up in bandages, and still in the hospital bed, Naruto was facing a very large, jailed Kyuubi. Naruto's instincts told him to fear, to be scared, but something soothed him, washing away the feeling and brought around wonder. He looked around and observed his surroundings. The Kyuubi was much bigger than ever, much bigger than he was ever told. He enjoyed the flames dancing on the Kyuubi's back, but with a quick growl, the Kyuubi got Naruto's attention.

"Who are you?" Naruto asked, using his five year old sense of curiousity.

_"I am the current resident of your body, Kyuubi the nine-tailed demon fox." _The fox replied. His voice seemed to bounce of invisible walls, giving an eerie echo effect. "What kind of a boy are you?" The Kyuubi growled again.

"What do you mean?"

"Your only five years old, and I already had to come out and save your ass from those angry mobsters!" Kyuubi yelled.

"R-S?" Naruto tested his new swearword. "What is an R-S?"

"A Naruto, not R." Kyuubi sighed. "Ass, your bum, but I meant save your life just then."

"So, my bum's my life?" Naruto wondered.

"Never mind." Kyuubisaid, asa large sweatdrop dropped from his head. "Do you wanna make a deal with a devil?" Kyuubi grinned, Naruto was taken aback by the size of his large teeth.

"So you're the devil now?" Naruto asked. "Where's your horns?"

"NO!"

"Then Okay."

"Fine, you keep yourself alive okay? Otherwise I'll come in and take over again okay?"

"But how will I keep myself alive?" Naruto asked.

"Eat right, drink right, use the toilet often... etc..."

"As in if they attack me again!"

"Naruto, when you wake up, you'll see a black-haired nin. Trust him. He will train you up, and as he trains you, I will help."

"OKAY!" Naruto nodded smiled. "I'll do itto become Hokage!"

"You swear you'll train hard and not get yourself killed?" Kyuubi asked. He enjoyed his sleeps, but killing once in the while was something he also liked.

"I swear it on my R-S!" Naruto held a hand to his chest.

"Kid, this is gonna be one hell of a relationship."

* * *

_Naruto, Age 8_

"So Naruto-san, what is your dream?" The black haired nin asked.

"How many times must I tell you?" The hyperactive eight-year old blonde asked. "TO BE HOKAGE!"

"Really?" The black haired nin played with a kunai in his hands, watching the boy running around in the grass. They were both happy, because here, they both felt free. Hanging around outside in the forests surrounding Konoha, where no one knew them, or could judge them.

"C'mon Itachi-kun!" The blonde-boy said. "I thought you said you were going to teach me something today!"

"Ah, yes, Naruto-san." Itachi smiled, messing up his head with his hand, to the annoyance of Naruto. "Oh c'mon, Naruto-san, it's not like your hair will be important in a battle! Come at me, if you can hit me once, then I will teach you something new."

"Okay! I will use the taijutsu techniques you taught me last time!" Naruto smiled.At 8 years old, under the tutelage of Itachi he had made much progress, and this had seemingly improved Itachi's motivation to try harder. Naruto slowly moved to a fighting stance Itachi showed him previously.

"Don't shake your leg so much, get down lower - I know it probably hurts but you'll get used to it!" Itachi said. Naruto charged with a kunai. When Itachi blocked Naruto spin kicked him. Naruto turned back into his brawling style of fighting and lunged for Itachi. Itachi dodged as Naruto tried to sneak in another punch. Itachi grabbed his hand and twisted it around his back, then pinned him to the ground. "Give up?"

"Nope." Naruto grinned. Using his free left hand, he threw a kunai aimed at Itachi's head. Right before it made contact, Itachi exploded, sending Naruto into another tree.

"Your kick should apply more force, and a better snapping action in the knees. Like this!" Itachi kicked Naruto in the stomach, sending him back into a tree.

"Hey Itachi-kun! Don't you have an ANBU mission today?" Naruto asked, to which Itachi smiled again.

"ANBU, what kind of low ranking ANBU do you think I am?" Itachi smiled.

"You... you were promoted?" Naruto asked, to which Itachi grinned.

"Yeah... Otouto..." Itachi smiled. "I also got this for you. I once copied a woman who could knit very good shirts." Itachi handed Naruto a shirt. It was the exact same as the Uchiha shirt, black, but instead of the fan on the back there was a yellow swirl,like Naruto's Uzumaki swirl on his back.

"Hey Itachi what's this?" Naruto asked, holding up an envelope.

"That's for later. I want you to read that tomorrow morning, not now anyway." Itachi said.

"Yeah, because now you are going to teach me a jutsu! Because of course, I hit you!" Naruto grinned.

"That I will do! Now let's begin!" The two went on, fighting until the late afternoon. And when Itachi felt Naruto had truly learnt the jutsu, him and Naruto walked back to the village, happy with today's training session.

* * *

Naruto got home. He couldn't help it. The anxiety. He reached out with his hand, and with his other hand slapped it out of the way. It had only been 2 minutes since they came back and he couldn't help but want to read the envelope. 

1 second. Naruto was scratching behind his neck, eyes transfixed on the envelope.

5seconds. Naruto stared at the envelope, as if daring for it to open itself right in front of himself.

10seconds. Naruto was now slapping his head, repeating the words Itachi told him. "NOT TILL TOMORROW!"

20 seconds. Naruto couldn't help himself, he dove down at the envelope, breaking the table it was on. Ripping open the thing, a piece of paper dropped out, revealing Itachi's neat handwriting.

_Dear Naruto,_

'Yes it's for me!' Naruto said loudly.

_I specifically remember telling you not to read this until tomorrow._

"He knew..."

_Naruto, I will be leaving tonight. I am going to do things that I will regreat, but I know I must do it. People will tell you what bad things I have done, and you have every right to believe them. And remember, most of all there are always two sides to a story Naruto._

_When we see each other again, I will be stronger, much more stronger. I hope you will be as well. I am leaving tonight, probably as soon as you have finished reading this letter. I shall be leaving north, to parts I cannot tell you._

_Much luck with your future Naruto, remember, always head North!_

_From your brother, Itachi._

"Strange..." Naruto thought out aloud. "All this talk about North... I GOT IT!" Naruto changed into the shirt Itachi gave him earlier, with black pants, and ran down the street.

* * *

Itachi breathed heavily as he stared at his blood soaked hands. His sword was drenched in his victims blood, and on the outside, it looked like he didn't care. Deep down though, he felt a sword twisting in his heart, as he walked a way from the bloodshed. He would never forget all the faces of everyone he killed. Thehomes was covered with corpses. Everything was now painted red, soon they would have to clean out the whole place, it stank. 

Looking back for a second on the murder site, he saw a boy, shivering with fear, huddled on the ground. He had done his deed, no doubt the boy would hunt for him in the future, he himself had asked him to become strong enough to one day defeat him - avenge the Uchiha clan, and maybe one day, rebuild it as the pure clan it once was - instead of the power hungry, greed driven group of nins 'cursed' with the Sharingan.

Itachi was now dressed in his normal clothes and had sent a letter to the Hokage, explaining his actions. He remembered his former best friend, Uchiha Shisui of the Shunshin.

How Shisui discovered the true meaning of the Uchiha's and was brought to the brink of madness by it. How he wanted so desperately to gain the power to lead his clan to take over the village and defeat the rival Hyuugas. This then brought Shisui to come to the decision to kill his best friend Itachi to gain the ultimate power.

Itachi didn't understand why Shisui attacked him that time, teleported behind his back and tried to stab him, but Shisui was no match for Itachi. Itachi barraged Shisui with water jutsus, to make it look like he drowned. Before Shisui died, he told Itachi of the plans of the Uchiha. To take over Konoha by force. They were training Itachi to be the leader, the most powerful of all the Uchihas, and the one to take over the position as Hokage. The Uchihas wanted power, and full control - Itachi would grant them that power.

Itachi couldn't face that. The Uchiha's pushed him further, tried to make him the monster they called him. Maybe they pushed him too far. Itachi couldn't stand it. As a nin his duty was to protect the village. As the Uchiha were furthering their plans to take over, Itachi decided he had to kill them all.

Ironic, Itachi thought. Ironic that the one to lead them to power, would destroy them all. He headed to the unused North gate of the village. No one but the higher ranking nins new about it, it was secluded and only to be used in an evacuation situation. Of course as soon as he got there, he heard someone running behind him. Tempted to draw his ANBU sword to kill the person, he decided to see.

"Itachi nii-san!" Naruto said, taking a deep breath before every syllable. Naruto took another deep breath before speaking again. "IfoundthecluesandwenttofindyouhearandIamgladyoudidbythewaycanIcomewithyou?" Naruto asked.

"Naruto... What are you doing here?" Itachi asked.

"I came to find you!" Naruto said, gaining back his breath. "You made a promise to the highest, the Hokage! That you would train me and protect me, and that I would follow you! And everyone should keep promises to the Hokage!"

"Naruto, I'm leaving the village. Most likely for good. You'll be a missing-nin as well you know."

"SO WHAT! I'LL STILL BE HOKAGE!" Naruto shouted.

"Shh! The whole village will hear us. Naruto, if you really want me to keep the promise, I will train you. Training will be hard Naruto, and you haven't even passed the academy yet!"

"I don't need to. Academy stinks. Except for Iruka-sensei, he gives me Ramen."

"So you can handle the tough training?" Itachi asked. The two began there walk towards the gate.

"Certainly!" Naruto nodded. "So where are we going?"

"To meet up with some people."

"For what?"

"You have too many questions."

"Tell me for what!"

"To make a group!" Itachi smiled.

"Called?" Naruto wondered.

"Akatsuki!" Itachi said.

"That sounds stupid." Naruto said.

"I know." Itachi patted Naruto on the head, messing up his hair as the two walked away, out of the village and into the nightime, as Naruto continued his questions.

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**First Chapter Done! Coming up Next : Meetings With Akatsuki, the 8 nicest psychotic people in the ninja world, With the extra evil 9th guy being Orochimaru...**


	2. Chapter 2 : Living With Psychotics

**Firstly, thanks for the reviews.**

**korrd : The pairings won't come until late into the series. In case anyone is wondering, since Naruto didn't become a genin and joined Kakashi's team then there is a chance they didn't go on the mission to Mist and neither Zabuza and Haku were killed. I'm saving those two characters for later. **

**Kalis-nin : I'm going to try my best to keep it close to the manga. The only OC's I'll probably have will be the Akatsuki members, but I'm drawing the line there.**

**Bruce, ace448, Pite, naruto 93, muaaimoi, tea, KitMiyu, LbcLostKid, silver windflame, devilwit: Thanks for the reviews, I don't want to rush this story too much, but I'll try to update as much as possible. I work and go to school, so if I don't update regularly, please excuse me.**

**Steve: There will be no yaoi at all. Not that I'm against it or anything... The Hinata thing, we'll wait and see.**

**Disclaimer : I do not own Naruto. I do own the characters Ayame, Kazuma, Ikkaku and Shin though.**

**(A/N) Enjoy the Akatsuki...**

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**Chapter 2 : Living With Psychotics**

_Naruto, Age 8 - 1 month after departure of Konoha - "The Genius Version Of Sex-Ed"_

Naruto's eyes darted around, looking for a movement in the bushes around him, as he hid behind a tree. Naruto was out of his home ground, and had to learn to adapt in other situations. This time it was in a forest distant from Konoha.

Naruto and Itachi had been traveling for a month to parts unknown, as Itachi was seeking out the base of his comrades. The map Itachi was given was pretty badly drawn. Firstly, it had two circles, one labelled "Fire" and the other labelled "Wind". Between the two circles wasa large X. Itachi knew it was a test of his skills - andhe was determined to prove himself. When Itachi came with the idea to split up for food, Naruto immediately sprung to action - making a trap, which was why Naruto had been hiding behind a tree for the past ten minutes..

"I guess no one ever told Itachi not to leave a child unattended..." Naruto sighed, the trap was set up for rabbits and other small animals, but he hadn't been succesful yet. A rustle in anearby bush raised Naruto's eyebrow. The click of the string he laid down set off the trap, and a kunai came from an above tree and dived itself down into the bush, a pretty bad way to die.

Naruto smiled, getting up to collect his prize. His smile left quickly his face as the same kunai was thrown from the bushes and back at Naruto, givinghim little time to deflect it with another of his kunais. Before he knew it, someone was standing behind him with a sword at his neck.

"Try and move, I dare you..." The voice from behind him taunted. Naruto quickly lifted his kunai to push away the sword, and broke free of the attacker's grasp. Naruto turned around to take a stab at the attacker, but an eerie blue strand of chakra extended itself of the sword and wrapped around Naruto, lifting him off ground.

"You!" The attacker said, staring at Naruto with his black eyes. "You failed!" The attacker smiled, before retracting the chakra from the sword and leaving Naruto to fall to the ground.

"C'mon Itachi, don't you think you were being a little too tough?" Naruto complained, wiping all the dirt off his back. Checking out a tear on the front of his shirt, he knew he'd have to get Itachi to make him another one.

"Do you think attackers would go easy on you? A jutsu or two would help, you know." Itachi ruffled Naruto's hair again, who immediately tried to shake it back into it's former place.

"Then let me have another go!" Naruto smiled. _'Kid, today's my nap day, so do it on your own...' _The Kyuubi deep inside him said, adding a big yawn, as if to make a point.

"Fine, we're only about half an hour away from our destination anyway... And you need the training." Itachi said, interuptting Naruto before he could reply to the Kyuubi.

Naruto had learnt from Itachi that before a battle the most important thing was to thinkup aplan and analyse the opponent. Gathering chakra in his feet, like Itachi taught him, he was able to jump up higher than normal. Throwing a couple of shuriken to distract Itachi, he utilized the main jutsu of his plan .

_'Alright Kyuubi... Watch me, I'll show you I can do this without your help!' _Naruto thought, while performing handseals.

"Katon : Goukakyu No Jutsu! (Fire Release : Grand Fireball Technique)" Naruto called, blowing a large fireball from his mouth, aiming at Itachi. Itachi willed Naruto on to add more flame and make it bigger, like a real Uchiha nin. Itachi smiled as the large fireball charged at him.

"Shunshin No Jutsu... (Body Flicker Technique)" Itachi teleported right above Naruto, and managed to pin him down to the ground. The fireball went straight towards a tree, lighting everythign surrounding them on fire. Naruto knew that he had just used a good strategy, but he also knew that Itachi was too good to fall for it.

"..." Itachi blinked, as he sat ontop of a squirming Naruto. He had sure produced a large fireball, worthy of being called an adult even. "Guess tomorrow's lesson will be about aim and control..." Itachi sighed. Luckily, with the help of a nearby lake Itachi was able to use a Suiton jutsu to put out the fire.

"That was cool!" Naruto grinned. "Teach me it!"

"Sorry Naruto, that's enough destruction for today." Itachi said. "We should continue walking, we only have a bit more to go."

"So Itachi..." Naruto began, looking up at his mentor.

"Yeah Naruto?" Itachi asked.

"Can I ask you something..." Naruto twiddled his thumbs shyly, in a way that Itaci had not seen before.

_10 LONG Minutes Later..._

"Woah." Naruto said, after their long conversation.

"Yes Naruto, that's how it happens." Itachi nodded. The last few minutes had been, in a sense, more than difficult for the genius to handle.

"So that's how it happens?" Naruto looked stunned. "The man and woman plant a seed?"

"Yeah... Sure Naruto..." Itachi wasn't sure what he should've told Naruto. He couldn't imagine what had caused the eight year old to ask such a question. The genius himself didn't know how to react when someone as young as Naruto asked that question, after all besides being a genius - Itachi was still only 13.

"So is that why I always see people with cabbages growing in their backyard?" Naruto asked.

"Yes Naruto. Yes." Itachi sighed, as a large sweatddrop came from his forehead.

"Woah." Naruto said again. "But what about-"

"We're here!" Itachi said, clasping his hands together, glad that the could change the conversation before it got any worse than it already was.

"Where?" Naruto asked. "I don't see anything but miles of forest."

"Watch..." Itachi said. Itachi started quickly moving his hands in a pattern of seals, it was almost too fast for Naruto. The handseals stopped after a couple of seconds, and a door appeared from the ground. Itachi smiled and gestured towards the ground. "Welcome home Naruto."

* * *

_Naruto, Age 8, 1 month later..._ _"Akatsuki Headquarters"_

A blue, shark-man strolled into the kitchen of the Akatsuki's "Top Secret Underground Headquarters". Which had a kitchen. And a bathroom. A gamesroom. And even a room with a built inhome theatre. Still it was an "Underground Headquarters". The leader himself had built it, due to his certain "skills". A little known fact was, since there were occasionally a shortage of missions, or a shortage of pay, shinobi's would take up other jobs to support themselves financially, and the leader... designed and built houses. He enjoyed working on the underground "house" and would always find another reason to build a random room, extending the headquarters further.

"Where's Naruto?" Asked the blue-coloured shark man, wielding a giant, bandaged sword. "I lost a poker match against him, so I have to do his chores for a week..." He groaned.

"Kisame, why were you playing poker with an eight year old?" Itachi raised an eyebrow, Kisame's bad gambling skills could have rivalled that of even the Legendary Sucker.

"Because he insisted! I didn't know an eight year old could play so well!" Kisame looked at Itachi, who was smiling as he played with his sword. "Wait a minute... You taught him how to cheat! Now he owes me chores!" Kisame said angrily.

"Did you catch him cheating?" Itachi asked, still smiling. Itachi was a formidable foe when playing card games, nothing could get past his sharingan and nothing could defeat his cheating skills.

"Well not really... He shuffled really fast... And he was dealing really quick while I was distracted." Kisame replied, making excuses for losing to an eight-year-old. "Anyway, what kind of a older brother are you! Teaching an innocent boy howto cheat!"

"You notice how fast his hands were right?" Itachi asked, to which Kisame nodded. "He's outside, training to improve the speed of his handseals. He's been doing it for a week, and making pretty good progress."

"Even though he's not a genius, he is a hard worker." Kisame sighed, and headed outside the underground base, towards the training Naruto. Just when Kisame was about to use the handseals to open the door, it opened right before his eyes. Naruto, sweating and exhausted, appeared from behind the doorway.

"I did it!" Naruto managed to breath. "And I also did some Taijutsu along the way..." Naruto nodded towards the scratched trees.

"You can do the handseals fast enough now, ay? One less thing to teach." Kisame smirked. "Your Taijutsu is pretty dodgy though, I guess I'll get Shin or someone to work on it with you..."

"At least now I don't have to have anyone open the door for me!" Naruto grinned. "One step closer to becoming Hokage!" As the words left his mouth the Akatsuki leader walked into the room- and he was laughing. "Why do you always laugh when I say that?" Naruto shouted.

"Because it's funny! Whenever you say that, it brings back good memories..." The leader smiled, looking at the boy with the blonde hair and blue eyes, exactly like his own. "But Naruto, I must congratulate you with the handseals, I might even consider teaching you a jutsu soon."

"C'mon Kazuma-sama! Teach me something now!" Naruto said.Naruto especially added the -sama, in case it would influence his decision. He would never normally be this polite, unless he was annoying the Akatsukis with requests to learn a new jutsu, which always worked except with Orochimaru and Kazuma. Kazuma was laid back, and most of the time pretended to be busy, where as Orochimaru just didn't like Naruto, and Naruto selected Orochimaru as the one Akatsuki member he didn't like.

"Shit Naruto!" Kisame shouted, turning around to see a fist smash the kitchen wall.

"He awoke..." Kazuma started, before Itachi and Kisame chimed in and in a freaky unison said - "The Demon." Itachi, Kisame and Kazuma all hid under the kitchen table, as a slender figure climbed through the large hole. A young, beautiful woman with long blue hair and blue eyes glared from the hole that was once a wall. Her eyes pierced like knives at the cowering figures under the table. She was in her sleeping gown, because unlike the rest of the guys - she didn't sleep naked.

"WHO WOKE ME UP!" She growled. Turning to Naruto she smiled sweetly, waved and said a small "Hello". She marched her way over to the kitchen table, and broke it straight in half with her fist. Taking out a kunai from her pocket she threw it so it landed right below Kisame's groin. She was a perfect shot, so the three Akatsuki's knew what she wanted.

"Sorry Ayame-sama!" The three called in unison.

"And..." Ayame asked.

"It won't happen again!" Kazuma chirped. Ayame, satisfied, turned around to leave, but caught a comment from the shark-man.

"Your legs look nice in that sleeping gown..." Kisame sneered. Stopping in her tracks, Ayame turned around and smiled sweetly at Kisame.

"Why thank you." Ayame said, to which Kisame was relieved, happy that she was not actually tempted to break his body in half. .It took the Akatsukis three seconds to realise that this was not her nice smile, but her evil smile. She threw a match at Kisame's cloak and before he knew it, he was on fire - literally. He ran laps around the shattered table, still on fire, with Itachi and Kazuma bearing looks of shock on their face.

Deidara, the clay artist, and Sasori, the man encased in a puppet shell, took one look at the flaming shark man, the angry kunoichi and the shocked boy and walked out of the room as quickly as they had came in. Zetsu, or as his friends called him "Mr. Fly Trap" for the Venus Fly Trap wrapped around his head, did the same, but went to the refrigerator to grab five packets of Tim-Tams before making a quick exit. Marching through the door, an angry, pale skinned, long haired man walked in.

"WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE!" Orochimaru yelled, he hated it when his precious work was interrupted by the likes of these "psychos". _'One day...' _He thought. _'I'm definetly going to leave this nuthouse...'_

"WHO ARE YOU TELLING TO SHUT UP!" Ayame yelled back. Orochimaru stood frozen in horror as Ayame punched him right through a wall, and then another wall, and then another wall, and then some more walls till he finally laid unconcious under a pile of rubble. Orochimaru was left tocurse the fact that Kazuma had built so many rooms.

Shin, a tall, brown haired man, who had his large iron hammer tied onto his back, cooly walked through the wall Orochimaru had just been punched through. Casually waving to the angry kunoichi, he walked over to the flaming sharkman, took out a cigarette, lit it, took one puff and left

"Hey Ikakku!" Shin called out to hisfellow Akatsuki memberbefore leaving through the same hole in the wall. "Could you please come down here and clean up this mess?" By clean up this mess, Shin really meant to calm down Ayame. Ikkaku, an average sized manwalked into the room, and stared at Ayame and the destruction surrounding her.

"Not again Ayame..." Ikkaku sighed. Flexing his arms, his muscles became engorged, and were as big as basketballs. Walking up to Ayame, he picked her up with his now giant hands, and brought her back to her room so she could go back to sleep. Ayame could be heard screaming down the hallway, vowing to come back and cause somemore havok.

"That was random..." Naruto thought out aloud. Realising everyone had either gone into hiding, or was unconcious, he decided to start making his ramen. As he was making his ramen he failed to notice that Itachi and Kazuma were now hiding in the kitchen closet incase Ayame came back, Kisame was still running around the house engulfed in flames, Orochimaru laid unconcious about two miles from where Naruto was standing, Sasori and Deidara were locked in their rooms, Zetsu was in the lounge room having a "Sex and the City" DVD marathon while chomping down packets of Tim-Tams, Shin was calmly having a smoke outside, Ikkaku (now with normal sized arms) waswatching Ayame, whowas now sound asleep.

This is the Akatsuki.

* * *

_Later That Night... "What Do S-Class Criminals Talk About Over Dinner?"_

"I can't believe it's been a month!" Kazuma sighed, resting on his chair at the meeting table with his fellow Akatsuki members. It was already past Naruto's bedtime (Ayame had taken on the motherhood role for Naruto, and no one could stop her) and the Akatsuki's were having their meeting in the "Meeting Room". Accompanying this room was also another kitchen built on Kazuma's insistence. Kazuma had also halted his building plans, to take time to repair all of the walls Ayame had broken.

"A month of wholesome family togetherness?" Shin said sarcastically, before taking another puff of his cigarette.

"Take it outside, or don't bring it in Shin!" Ayame complained, taking out a small Japanese fan to blow away the smoke. Shin took the cigarette and pressed the butt into his hand. A long, sizzling sound was made, but there were no scars on Shin's skin as he carelessly tossed what was left of the cigarette away.

"A month of midnight meetings..." Shin sighed. "Do we get a mission yet?"

"Yeah." Kazuma said, falling into his deep space of imagination.

"And..." Ikkaku nodded for the leader to continue on.

"Mostly bounty hunting missions." Kazuma said. "The mainpointof these is to gain alarge amount of money, and also make a name for ourselves."

"What about the teams you were talking about?" Itachi asked.

"Well I figured, since there are ten of us, we might aswell split us into pairs. The missions will run more smoothly that way, and one can bail the other one out in case they get into any trouble." Kazuma explained, to which the rest of the Akatsuki members nodded.

"So who do I go with?" Kisame asked.

"Since you asked first, then we'll start with you to make it easy. I made the pairs based on your various skills and powers." Kazuma cleared his throat, pulled out a small scroll and started reading the names. "Kisame, you will be paired with Itachi. You'll be responsible for all the assasination missions and such." Kisame and Itachi looked at each other, smirked (they had recieved the funnest job) then went back to let Kazuma continue."Your missions will be handed out later. Shin, you'll be matched up with Ikakku. You'll be responsible for defending this place, and attacking other people. Zetsu and Orochimaru, you both shall be the ones todo the searching.Spy and do stealthy stuff like that new Bond movie."

"I thought that was still being filmed?" Zetsu asked.

"They finished about a week ago, it was rather disappointing... I miss you Sean Connery..." Kazuma shook his head, as if he was about to cry about the fact that his favorite movie franchise had been ruined. "Sasori, you and Deidara will do all the capturing. And lastly... Ayame and Me... We'll do everything else." Ayame looked very pissed off at her leader. Kazuma knew that whoever he paired her up with, she'd still be pissed off.

"I have a question for you Kazuma." Itachi asked. "What about Naruto? He still has his "demons" inside him..." Itachi had rather not called Naruto a "container" or "Jinchuuruki". He found that most insulting to Naruto and would make sure to hurt anyone who called him such.

"The Kyuubi still is the most important of our plans... But that doesn't mean we're going to use Naruto. He'll be under our care, being under the situation he is in right now, a lot of people would be interested about his whereabouts." Kazuma said.

"And what of his dream of becoming Hokage?" Kisame wondered.

"If it ever doeshappen, it would be quite hilarious, don't you think?" Kazuma asked.

"So you think he can't do it?" Ayame asked, to which Kazuma smiled.

"No not at all. That would just make the first Akatsuki Kage..."

* * *

_Naruto, Age 9, 2 months later... "Birthday Celebrations"_

The Akatsuki were drunk. Outside of the base they would always be cool, calm and frightening to everyone around them, but once in a while they needed their release. A thing about the Akatsuki was that most of them couldn't hold their own when drinking - especially Orochimaru. Shin, unlike the rest of them, could hold his ownand just stood by and laughed at everyone else. Kazuma himself could stand the alcohol, but just pretended to be drunk for fun and for the sake of it. The funniest part of it all though, was the fact that the drunken Akatsuki's were trying their best to sing in pitch - while still taking big gulps of their alcohol.

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!" The Akatsuki sung out loudly. Orochimaru, who was usually conservative, was out of his mind, dancing around like only drunk people can do. "HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO NARUTO! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!"

"AND YOU SMELL LIKE ONE TO!" Kazuma, the leader, laughed out so loud, that he nearly fell off the table he was standing on. Kisame had bad footing, and fell off a chair he was standing on. As he did fall off though, his sword scraped the mist headband on his head. In his drunkeness, Kisame put the headband on, and flew around the room pretending to be Super Ninja or something like that. He stared at the headband with a slash across the symbol.

"Hey loo- loo- LOOK EVERYONE!" Kisame belched out. Pointing at his head band. "Lack... Lick... Like! Like my headband!"

"Wow..." Deidara said, before they all took out their head bands, drew out a kunai and made a slash across it. Kazuma was the only one who didn't do it, because he didn't have a headband. "Happy birthday Naruto!" Deidara yelled out, to which everybody in the room raised their glass and repeated the phrase.

"Uh, thanks..." The now 9 year old Naruto managed to smile in front of his drunken friends. Itachi walked behind Naruto and slumped himself over the young boy's shoulder.

"Now Naruto! Here's your pre... your pre..." Itachi tried to get the words out of his drunken mouth.

"My present!" Naruto smiled.

"Yeah, here you go!" Itachi managed to hand Naruto a new Uchiha shirt with the Uzumaki swirl on the back and a new pair of pants.

"Ok... Guys..." Kazuma said. Naruto laughed, the usually graceful Akatsuki were off the walls. "Let's do the jutsu before we start killing each other. Like last time..." Kazuma's eyes swirved over to Ayame, who was practically destroying whatever got in her way.

"Aw man... It was fun watching you guys..." Naruto sighed as the Akatsuki started off the handseals. After perfroming the jutsu, the Akatsuki were turned back to normal. In normal life, getting drunk could only be overcome by bed rest, but if you were a ninja then the only difficult part was trying to perform the justu when you can't even walk a straight line.

"That was fun..." Kazuma smiled.

"You guys looked all looked like fools!" Ayame laughed.

"And you didn't?" Kisame shot back. Orochimaru chose to seclude himselffrom the laughing group,angry that he allowed himself to get _that _drunk. "What's up your bum, Mr. Anti-Social?" Kisame called to Orochimaru, who just pulled the finger at him.

"Birthday Jutsus!" Naruto grinned, heading for the staircase.

"Naruto, it's late at night, should you really be training now?" Sasori asked, seemingly suffering from a hangover. For special occasions, or for getting drunk, Sasori would get out of his shell- literally. Outside he wasn't really that tall, but he still could strike fear in the eyes of his opponents.

"It's 3:00 pm..." Naruto replied. "And you all promised me for my birthday..."

"That we'd each teach you a jutsu..." Kazuma sighed. "Hey Itachi what were you going to teach him?"

"I already taught him a technique. He asked for an early birthday present, so I gave him one." Itachi said, back to his normal self.

"And what was that?"Ikkaku asked, the genius that copied many jutsus could probably teach anything.

"Kage Bunshin no Jutsu..." Itachi said.

"Kage Bunshin!" Kisame exclaimed. "That's crap! Teach him something cool, like the Mizu Bunshin!"

"Mizu Bunshin?" Deidara sighed back. "A clay bunshin would be perfect for Naruto!"

"Weak!" Sasori coughed out loudly, causind Deidara to turn around and give him the evils.

"What'd you say?" Deidara growled.

"Why use a bunshin when you have puppets?" Sasori asked. Inside his large puppet shell, he was smirking - though it wasn't like it mattered, none of them would see it.

"Why?" Ayame asked. "I was going to teach him a more _useful _technique then any of you idiots could produce."

"What exactly? How to scare guys off with your strength?" Zetsu laughed, Kisame and the rest immediately backed away from what was going to happen.

"I'll show you strength!" Ayame yelled, but before she could take a punch, Zetsu had already disappeared through the walls. Orochimaru walked back into the group, and stood next to Naruto.

"Quiet fools, I already have a lesson planned for him." Orochimaru growled. "Just don't interrupt." The Akatsukis were shocked by Orochimaru's comment. Why the hell did Orochimaru want to train and teach Naruto?

"Is this a joke? Orochimaru actually teaching Naruto?" Kazuma laughed. "Woah... I thought I'd see a pig fly before that happened."

"There's nothing funny about it. What are you guys staring at!" Orochimaru glared atthe restof the group.Grabbing Naruto by the collar, who was ecstatic that he was going to learn a jutsu from Orochimaru, he took Naruto outside, to begin their training. Itachi took one look at the back of Orochimaru, walking out the door, and through his eyes he knew something was wrong...

* * *

**THAT'S IT FOLKS! Geez that took longer than I thought... Damn computer, broke down when I finished the first copy of the chapter. The ending and events to the first copy of the chapter was actually alot different than what I wrote here, though I'm happy I did it. By next chapter the stories of the 4 Akatsuki OC's - Kazuma, Shin, Ikkaku and Ayame - will all be explained, I might also add a little profile of them in the next chapter as well. **

**Coming Up Next... What Is Orochimaru Planning?**


	3. Chapter 3 : Snakes And Ladders

**Thanks for the reviews guys, it helps. Again, I'll try to update as much as possible.**

**MerKitten, Sesshylovr07 : I try to keep humour in the story. Even Akatsuki's have their weaknesses (being drunk and such).**

**Kalis-nin : Cheers :D, Orochimaru is not going to give Orochimaru a cursed seal, though Orochimaru does want Naruto for something else... Good job pointing out the fact that the leader looks like the fourth hokage, though that doesn't mean he is...**

**Gaara the hated : Orochimaru is going to appear alot in this story. Tim-Tams are chocolate biscuits, depending on where you live you could probably pick them up at a local supermarket. They're boss.**

**Tea : I like my OC's aswell, and the idea of the Akatsuki. Ayame is one of my favorites, being the fact that she is the only female Akatsuki, and I think there should be more overpowered super kunoichi's.**

**I split this chapter into two parts. Firstly, Orochimaru's betrayal and Naruot's training.Cheers.**

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* * *

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**Chapter 3 : Snakes and Ladders**

"So Naruto..." Orochimaru said, flashing one of his creepy smiles. Naruto wasn't really scared of Orochimaru, just really creeped out. After all right below where they were standing were the Akatsuki headquarters, so Orochimaru wouldn't dare to do anything - would he? "Try and fight me!" Orochimaru called.

"What?" Naruto blurted out. He wanted to learn a jutsu not have a fight. Even the Kyuubi inside Naruto, who was always watching, knew something was wrong with this situation.

"Just as training." Orochimaru tried to reassure Naruto. "I have never seen you fight, so I want to know what level of a jutsu I have to teach you!"

"Oh right!" Naruto replied, easily convinced by Orochimaru. But still, Naruto thought he had a creeply smile, and an even creepier laugh. "Teach me your highest level one!"

"Don't be cocky Naruto!" Orochimaru said. "If you want me to teach you the highest levelled jutsu, then you might as well try your hardest!"

"I'll warn you now Orochimaru!" The now nine year old grinned. "Don't underestimate me..." Naruto pulled out a kunai, preparing to attack Orochimaru. He ran at Orochimaru, who easily dodged the kunai, caught Naruto's left arm and tossed him into a tree.

_'What the hell was that?" _Naruto thought, shifting his weight to land on the ground before he hit the tree. _'Is he trying to kill me with that kind of move?' _Naruto stood up straight, still wondering why Orochimaru tried to throw him into the tree. Usually for the other Akatsuki members, they would always be on the defensive against him, never try to harm him like that.

"Nice landing there!" Orochimaru smiled, the creepiness sending shivers down Naruto's spine. Naruto found this a perfect oppurtunity to utilise the technique Itachi had taught him. He picked up his dropped kunai, andwent to attack Orochimaru again. Orochimaru again dodged Naruto's right hand, and went to grab his left, but found he had a log instead of an arm. "Kawarimi No Jutsu eh Naruto?" Orochimaru looked up to see Naruto descending from the sky performing handseals.

"KAGE BUNSHIN NO JUTSU!" Naruto called out, splitting himself into five people. Orochimaru pulled out his sword to destroy them, but the Kage Bunshin's were performing another move. "KATON : GOUKAKYUU NO JUTSU!" The five Naruto's called out, blowing out giant fireballs at Orochimaru. Contact was made, and the five Naruto's surrounded the smoke where Orochimaru was standing. The smoke left, and Orochimaru was gone. Naruto turned around to see one of his Kage Bunshin's disappear into smoke. He looked towards his left and now two more were gone.The last bushin was destroyed, and Naruto was pushed to a ground with a sword held athis neck.

"That was a nice display of jutsu's Naruto." Orochimaru sneered. "You know Naruto, you're not as strong as you think you are. You're actually quite weak." Orochimaru kicked Naruto, rolling him over so he could face him. Bending over Orochimaru stared into the eyes of Naruto. "You, my young friend, are going to help me defeat the Akatsuki."

"Like I would ever help you." Naruto spat at Orochimaru's face. Orochimaru wiped off the spit, and punched Naruto in the stomach.

"Listen up Naruto. The one thing you will help me achieve, the thing that I cannot do alone, without your help Naruto!" Orochimaru smiled, envisioning himself in the future, with the one true power he had been aiming for. "Itachi's eyes..." Naruto stared at Orochimaru, with a look of hatred. His normal, innocent blue eyes, turned to dark shade of red. His pupils were slitted, and fangs grew from his teeth. Swiping at Orochimaru's face with his claws, Naruto jumped up, to a shocked Orochimaru.

"So this is the Kyuubi?" Orochimaru said, with slight curiousity. "To me, looks kind of weak."

Kyuubi Naruto charged at Orochimaru, punching him with all the force he could muster. Orochimaru was barely able to block with his sword, kicking Naruto back, and taking a swing with his sword. Naruto had nothing to block with, so he tried his best to dodge, but was slashed on his side. Kyuubi Naruto charged again, flailing wildly at Orochimaru, who was easily able to dodge, block and parry anything Naruto threw at him. Orochimaru punched Naruto in the chest, and threw him onto the ground. He kicked Naruto repeatedly, shouting at him.

"Get up! Don't you want to learn that jutsu!" Orochimaru mocked. He picked up Naruto and threw him into another tree. Naruto was knocked out, the Kyuubi features disappearing. Orochimaru walked over to Naruto, tied him up with some rope, and opened the door to the Akatsuki headquarters.

* * *

Grinning, at the top of the staircase was Orochimaru. With the sun shining behind him his skin looked somewhat paler. At the bottom of the staircase was Kazuma, Itachi, Ayame and Shin, all shocked to see Naruto lying unconcious in front of them, tied up, with Orochimaru pointing his sword at his neck. 

"This better be some sick joke Orochimaru..." Ayame growled.

"Why? So you have another excuse to hit me?" Orochimaru laughed. "If it was a joke, I'd have you all laughing by now. But seriously, give me what I want, or Naruto dies. Standard hostage situation."

"What is it you want?" Itachi asked.

"Ahh, always straight to the point, Itachi-san." Orochimaru said. "But if you must know, your Sharingan."

Ayame pulled out a kunai in anger. "Why don't you just get the hell out of here before I rip you to shreds."

"Excuse me?" Orochimaru asked. "Someone sure is moody today." As far as crazy, sadistic villains go, Orochimaru was probably the worst. Ayame prepared to throw the kunai, before Orochimaru raised up a hand to pause her. "Haven't you forgotten? Naruto dies if you make a move. And you Itachi, before you do anything, close your eyes. Don't try to pull any doujutsu tricks on me." Naruto awoke, to find Orochimaru's foot pressing into his stomach. Rage stirred inside of Naruto, but rather than try to move and let Orochimaru know he was awake, he kept still, waiting for the perfect oppurtunity.

"How long exactly have you been planningthis?" Shin asked, staring into the eyes of Orochimaru. Naruto turned to Kazuma, who was seemingly silent, but fidgeting with his hands a little too much - as if he was nervous. Naruto couldn't undesrstand why Kazuma would be nervous, except till he looked closer at his hands. Naruto noticed that Kazuma was doing a pattern. First, Kazuma would point in Naruto's direction, then he would make handseals, after that he would lift his hands to his mouth and blow in it. It took Naruto three more times to get it, as he recognized the handseals Kazuma was making.

"I haven't actually been planning it for too long. You see, for a group who was supposed to "break" all bonds, you still have one weakness." Orochimaru grinned, pressing the heel of his foot further into Naruto's body. "This little blonde brat. You guys have pretty much neglected him, you were supposed to train him, make him strong, teach him something useful. But no, he is weak. He is a burden on you people, he can't even defend himself." Orochimaru let out a loud laugh, angering Naruto, who more than anything wanted to kill this Shinobi - if only Orochimaru wasn't stronger than him. Looking back up at Kazuma for the signal, Kazuma stared him into Naruto's eyes, and winked. Naruto nodded in return.

Orochimaru was never good at a hostage situation, or capturing nins. The first step, making sure they were unconcious - he failed. The second step, tie them up - he succeeded. Sort of. Orochimaru had made two mistakes, and Kazuma and Naruto noticed them both. The first of these was that Naruto's hands were bound together. By binding the hands together, they were able to clasp together, therefore form handseals. Secondly, his mouth had not been shut, making him able to call out the jutsu.

Naruto turned his head so he was facing Orochimaru. Concentrating deeply he did the handseals, and when he completed it, he called out the jutsu.

"KATON : GOUKAKYUU NO JUTSU!" Naruto yelled at the top of his voice, gaining attention of everyone in the head quarters, and Orochimaru. Naruto tried with all his might to produced his largest fireball yet, and damage Orochimaru as much as possible. In the midst of the fire, Orochimaru was thrown back, Kazuma managed to grab Naruto to safety and untie him and all the other Akatsukis were gathered in front of the staircase.

"You better have a pretty good escape plan Orochimaru, or your dead." Ayame cracked her knuckles, ready to beat up Orochimaru.

"And I do..." Orochimaru grinned. "Because you see, outside of the headquarters are ANBU and Hunter-nins from the villages of Sand and Leaf, all looking for you guys by the way." Orochimaru performed the handseals to open the door, and just as he said, outside were squads of Shinobi's from thetwo villages. "I'll be off then..."Orochimaru prepared his handseals. "Kuchiyose No Jutsu!" Orochimaru called, as a giant snake appeared from the ground. "Have fun, my fellow Akatsuki's." Orochimaru jumped onto the snake, and both left down a hole in the ground.

"Don't try to follow him Itachi..." Kazuma stopped his friend. "We'll have to take care of the ANBU problem first."

"I'll take care of it, not all of us need to go." Itachi volunteered himself. "Plus, I need to blow off some steam."

"I'll come aswell..." Shin said, lighting up a cigarette.

"Okay!" Kazuma nodded. "That's good, that's all we need. Before we go though, remember to leave one Shinobi from the Leaf and one from the Sand."

"Why?" Shin asked.

"So they can tell their Kage's how strong we really are..." Kazuma, proceeded to walk out into the squads of ANBU nins, with Itachi and Shin closely behind. Shin took off the large iron hammer from his back, to reveal a chain, running from the hilt of the hammer to his wrist. Itachi brought out his own sword while Kazuma just cracked his knuckles.

* * *

_10 minutes later..._

"That was rather disappointing..." Shin commented, as the three walked back into the headquarters, leaving behind the forest filled with dead bodies and puddles of blood. Shin began wipinghis iron hammer, while Kazuma was just washing the blood from his hands.

"Why?" Ayame asked.

"They were Chunin level at best!" Kazuma complained.

"What do you expect." Itachi commented. "They didn't know whether to take Orochimaru's information seriously, so they sent what they thought was good enough for the job."

"Well your not the one complaining, you had a strong opponent! And you sent her back as well!" Shin shook his head. "And it was all because you knew her..."

"Wait, you knew one of those Chunins sent to kill us?" Ayame raised a eyebrow.

"Firstly, she's Jounin level, and secondly -" Itachi started.

"You like her?" Ikkaku said.

"She was my former team mate..." Itachi sighed. "And the one that took my spot as ANBU captain when I left..."

"Hiryuu Asuka." Kazuma said, removing a book from his pocket.

"How did you know that?" Itachi asked, before noticing the book. "Hey! Get your hands off my diary!"

"Itachi-chan has a diary?" Kisame laughed.

"He also has a stamp collection, a book on Origami and his Genin academy yearbook..." Kazuma smiled slyly as he pulled out three more books.

"What's this?" Kisame gasped, looking into the diary before he started reading out the passage. "Dear Diary, Today I thought Ayame rather looked fat... Interesting there Itachi..." Ayame immediately began to advance on Itachi, when Naruto walked into the room. The slash he recieved from Orochimaru's sword had been dressed, and bandaged by Ikkaku.

"Don't walk around too much Naruto!" Ikkaku said. "You'll open the wound."

"I'm sorry." Naurto said sadly."It was my fault that he got us all into this mess. Now we're going to have to move places, and Itachi's Sharingan almost was stolen..."

"The innocent mind of a ten year old..." Deidara shook his head.

"Naruto it's not your fault." Kazuma replied. "Instead of walking around acting disappointed, do what I always do!"

"And that is..." Naruto asked.

"Train Naruto. Become stronger. Once you are strong enough you can protect all of the people precious to you." Kazuma said. "Because once you are protecting your precious ones, you can become as strong as you need to!"

"Really?" Naruto smiled, changing emotions rather quickly. "I, Uzumaki Naruto, vow never to lose again!"

"That's a pretty big promise..." Itachi said.

"Can I have one request, though?" Naruto asked, to which Kazuma nodded. "I want a sword."

"Why?" Kazuma asked, even though behind Kazuma, Kisame was already thinking up a million possibilities for making Naruto a sword.

"When Orochimaru attacked me, his sword was too powerful for any of my kunai or blocks!" Naruto replied.

"I guess your right... We'll get you a sword, Kisame looks ever so pleased to make you one..." Kazuma said.

"Kazuma-kun, he was right before about one thing." Zetsu butted in.

"Yeah, we really do need to change location." Sasori said. "Deidara can take care of the demolition of this headquarters."

"I've already set up the clay explosions around the place. They have been there from the start to pull pranks on Itachi... So we better start moving, otherwise we'll explode with the headquarters." Deidara said.

"Alright then, let's go." Kazuma said. "I'll miss this place, so many unfinished rooms..."

"Oh I forgot to ask!" Zetsu said. "What happens to Orochimaru's spot? Because there's this guy named Tobi..."

"That, will be filled up very shortly." Kazuma said, as the rest of the Akatsukis turned for his answer. "This little guy gets the ring! He'll become one of us, officially."

"I thought I already am!" Naruto replied.

"Well you are now," Kazuma said, slipping on Orochimaru's Akatsuki ring onto Naruto's hands. The ten Akatsuki members begun to walk out of the headquarters, and towards a new home.

* * *

_1 Year Later - The New Akatsuki Headquarters_

"Naruto!" Kisame yelled at the blonde boy. "Stop shaking your legs in that stance!" Kisame gestured to the way his legs were while holding the sword. Naruto on the other hand was holding the sword right, but was barely holding the stance.

"It's hard, Kisame-kun!" Naruto complained.

"Well someone quits early..." Kisame replied, to which Naruto immediately straightened his stance, and was able to hold it perfectly. "See kid, that's all you need, motivation!" Naruto's sword was less than four feet, in the shape ofa standard Katana.

"I've got it!" Naruto grinned, to which Kisame nodded, while Itachi just looked on from the rock he was sitting on. They were in a forest - again - but if you were ever to venture inside the forest, you would notice the large three-story house right in the middle of it. After countless complaints of the underground headquarters being too "stuffy" Kazuma built the house, and the Akatsukis cloaked it with countless Genjutsus, and of course a couple of traps laying about.

"Times up Kisame!" Itachi said, before getting off the rock and walking towards Naruto. The Akatsukis had developed a roster of when Naruto needed training, so they could circulate between missions, training themselves, training Naruto and their own personal "free time". Kisame and Ayame were in charge of weapons and the use of his sword, Itachi and Kazuma were in charge of his Ninjutsu and Genjutsu training, Ikkaku and Shin covered Taijutsu with him, Sasori taught him all about traps, poisons and others, while Deidara showed him explosives. Zetsu wasn't included in the training sessions much due to the fact that Naruto was allergic to his head. "Today Naruto, we will cover cloaking jutsus, one that Kisame will help me demonstrate today!"

"Kirigakure No Jutsu!"Kisame called, as a large shroud of mist covered the entire area.

"Holy crap..." Naruto said, as he lost himself within the shroud of mist. Out of nowhere, Kisame had grabbed him from behind, holding him down against the ground. "Okay... I really need to know that jutsu!" Kisame laughed at the remark, as he slowly began to retract the chakra used for the jutsu, and the mist disappeared shortly. Itachi approached Naruto with a bucket of water. "What's this?" Naruto asked.

"A bucket of water." Itachi replied, as cooly as he always did.

"That is pretty obvious, but why do I need a bucket of water?" Naruto asked.

"Kisame is special, in the way he can create water out of the elements in the air..." Itachi replied. "He is one of few people that can do that, and since you most likely are not one specialized in water, and since it takes a long time of training to do that, you need a water source. So, repeat these handseals after me." Itachi said, beginning the handseals slowly, which Naruto copied. Slowly Naruto began the handseals, before he got it at the right speed.

"KIRIGAKURE NO JUTSU!" Naruto shouted, as a small portion of the large bucket of water turned into mist, covering only the spot where Naruto was standing.

"I didn't think you'd be that bad at water jutsus..." Kisame said, for as soon as Naruto created the small patch of mist, it disappeared.

"The cloaking mist jutsu is important Naruto... You need to practice it!" Itachi said.

"But I don't really like using it, it doesn't seem useful to me since I don't use water jutsus!" Naruto replied. "I can already create fire, so water just seems silly!"

"Do you really want to see how useful it is?" Kisame smiled, beforebeginning the handseals."Kirigakure No Jutsu!" Kisame called, he used so much chakra in the jutsu, that it covered the whole forest. "If you can defend yourself like this Naruto! Then I will admit it isn't that useful for you!"

Naruto was scared now, when Kisame wanted to prove a point, he would. He couldn't see where he was andhe barely dodged the flying shuriken as it whizzed past his ear, normally Kisame would've thrown it faster. Another slow shuriken almost hit him as he blocked it with his sword. "Ready to give up Naruto?" Kisame asked, to which Naruto just backed away from the spot the shuriken was thrown at him, trying to hide behind a tree. "You cannot hide in _my _mist..." Suddenly Naruto felt his belly rumble.

_"Seriously kid..." _The voice of the Kyuubi inside him said. _"Are you really going to let yourself lose so easily?" _The Kyuubi cackled.

_"I'm not going to lose! I promised!" _Naruto replied, yelling inside of his mind.

_"I'll give you a tip Naruto, he can create water out of the air, with my help, you can create fire..." _Kyuubi replied.

_"So what?" _Naruto asked.

_"Water is to mist, as fire is to..." _Kyuubi begun.

"Smoke..." Naruto muttered. He knew it was going to take a lot of work, so he requested the Kyuubi helped him with it. Concentrating, he began handseals. "Katon : Gokakyuu No Jutsu!" Naruto called, released a large fireball onto the ground, creating fire.

"That's not going to help Naruto..." Kisame said, obviously getting overconfident. "Water puts out fire Naruto, remember that!" Naruto was grinning, even though the fire was dying down, Naruto had a chance to utilise the jutsu he and Kyuubi just thought up.

"Kemurigakure No Jutsu!" Naruto said, as slowly the fire turned into smoke, covering the area in which Naruto, Kisame and Itachi were standing. Using the Kyuubi's chakra, he was able to replace all the mist with his own smoke._"Thanks Kyuubi..."_

_"Congratulations kid, you just made your own jutsu..." _Naruto could feel Kyuubi smiling inside of him. Using the smoke, Naruto knew where Kisame was, and walked up right beside him and tapped him on the shoulder.

"Admit it." Naruto smiled, as the smoke died away.

"You gotta hand it to the kid Kisame," Itachi said. "He sort of outsmarted you with the smoke."

"Fine. But still! Mist is better than Smoke! Water's better than fire!" Kisame replied, like a grumpy little boy. Out of nowhere, Kazuma appeared, apparently to congratulate Naruto. He walked over to Naruto to ask him a question.

"Naruto, did you get any help with the jutsu?" Kazuma asked.

"What do you mean?" Naruto replied, to which Kazuma gestured at his stomach. "Oh that..."

"Naruto, touch this paper for me..." Kazuma held out a piece of paper, and as soon as Naruto touched it, it sliced in half. As the two halves of the paper fell to the ground though, they lit on fire and turned to ash.

"What does that mean?" Itachi said. "Two different chakra's in one..."

"When Naruto is relying on his own chakra, it is wind, that is why the paper chopped in half." Kazuma said. "But, when Naruto is using the Kyuubi's chakra, it is fire, so the paper lit up."

"So what does that mean?" Kisame asked.

"Things are going to get interesting..." Kazuma smirked.

* * *

**Next chapter awaits! Includes - What is really going on in Konoha? What has happened to everybody else? Who took Naruto's spot in Team 7? And how has Naruto's training changed him at 13?**


	4. Chapter 4 : Make Your Move

**Thanks for the reviews, here are some replies to some of them.**

**Midnight's Requiem : You know, sometimes I feel writing the title is harder than the story...**

**Madnarutofan : The Hokage wouldn't want to tell the village their strongest missing nin has ran off with the demon. People would start to really doubt the Hokage, but at the same time, they would be glad that a psycho took care of their demon problem.**

**Chichi : Akatsuki are misunderstood - according to me. Itachi made a promise to train Naruto, and he's not backing down. **

**The Chunnin Exam is coming up. And it's going to be special. Competing this time around isTeam 7 with their new team member, Sand Siblings, the Sound Team and my special mist team with Haku. And there is still the mystery of what team Naruto will be on... And also, last chapter Hiryuu Asuka was mentioned... (This starts off while Naruto is 13...)**

* * *

**Chapter Four : Make Your Move**

_Hokage's Office..._

Sarutobi, or as people called him Sandaime, the Third Hokage, stared blankly at the letter he recieved five years earlier.He hadread the letter many times throughout the five years he had held it,hepractically remembered it off by heart.He could recognize that neat handwriting anywhere, the handwriting of someone whom he personally saw to become ANBU Captain, and who he saw leave, to become a missing nin. The letter was from none other than Uchiha Itachi.

_Dear Hokage-sama,_

_Through the mission you gave me to spy on my own clan,I have found that our suspicions were correct. The Uchiha's were planning a full scale take over of Konoha, as I have written in full detail on the back of this letter. They have been keeping secrets from Konoha, specifically at a shrine hidden, the location is also on the back of the letter._

_I am also writing to apologize for what I have done. For as soon as you have read this, the Uchiha clan will be gone, save the one survivor I left - my brother. I felt it would be easier if the burden of the bloodshed was my fault, not yours or the villages, and I also wanted to see what kind of a monster the Uchiha bloodline had made of me. In the envelope I have left some money, to continue my brother's education in the academy, in the hopes he might become strong enough to rebuild our forsaken clan._

_Lastly, there comes the topic of Uzumaki Naruto. Naruto is persecuted by the people of the village, and I feel that while he is here, he will always feel sadness. He is coming with me, for training to become strong enough for himself, but do not worry - he will return to the village. I kept a promise with you to protect him and that promise will not change. What I am asking for thoughis five years, when he will return to you, to compete in the Chunin Exam. The circumstances under which he will compete are still unknown to even me, but you have my word that he will be there._

_From Uchiha Itachi. _

Sandaime paced around his office, before stopping at his window. This was one of his favorite spots in all of Konoha, not because it was his office, but because of the fact that through the window of the Hokage's tower, you could see over all of Konoha. It was almost time for him to call a meeting for all of the Jounins with teams. The Chunin Exam was about to begin.

* * *

_Team 7 training ground..._

"What's today's missions Kakashi-sensei?" A young, raven-haired boy asked.

"It better not be farm duty! I hate farm duty!" The pink kunoichi standing next to the raven haired boy said.

"A mission is a mission, deal with it." A white haired boy, with his Konoha headband covering his eyes replied.

"For the so called 'genius team' you are pretty whiny." Kakashi smiled under his mask, turning around to face his students. The 'genius team', comprising of the'avenger' Uchiha Sasuke, the intelligent Haruno Sakura, and thecunning Hiryuu Kira, was possibly one of the best rookie teams to come out of the academy in a while. One of the main reasons for this was the fact that they ignored the Genius-Female-Dropout formula, and instead came up with the Genius-Intelligent-Genius team. Though they were great, they were full of tragic stories.

Uchiha Sasuke, the last survivor of the Uchiha clan, save his brother Itachi who murdered the clan, has his mind set on vengeance and revenge. The thirst for vengeance is one of the reasons why he trains every day with his rival and friend, Hiryuu Kira who is also afterUchiha Itachi, who crippled his sister Asuka. The two boys have both been competing furiously, much supported by Kakashi, for the title of the one to take vengeance on Itachi.

Hiryuu Kira wasn't supposed to be a nin in the first place. His parents had refused to put him in the academy, after hearing that the demon which had destroyed half their clan was going to be sitting in the same classroom as their "special little boy". But when word got around that he left - presumed dead -they jumped for joy and sent their precious son to the academy. His specialitywastheHiryuu clan's cursed eyes, so traumatic to the mind of the user that they have to keep them closed for safety, relying on their clan trait chakra bouncing - the ability to bounce chakra off objects to detect where they are.

And Haruno Sakura, though intelligent, had also become quite masterful at earth jutsus. Besides that, there wasn't much left.

"Shouldn't you be training?" Kakashi asked, telling his students.

"What no jobs today?" Sasuke asked.

"No, since I have to go now, the Hokage called a meeting for all Jounins - and that means me." Kakashi said, before poofing away.

"What a lazy teacher..." Kira muttered under his breath. "I guess we should be training anyway." And with that, a fight broke out in the middle of the street. The chaos of the day was just beginning - not only in the Leaf, but in other villages as well.

* * *

_Meanwhile, in the Village of Sand..._

"Do we have a deal then, Kazekage?" The pale, snake like man grinned towards the man sitting behind the desk infront of him.

"I guess we do, Otokage, is that what I call you?" The Kazekage replied, with a smile on his face. If the plan went his way, and not to the snake demon's favour, this could prove very helpful for the Sand Village.

"Otokage... I guess it would be safe to call me that." The snake man said. "I better be off then, my new village is still preparing, I'd rather be there watching over."

"See you later, Orochimaru." The Kazekage waved, as Orochimaru walked out of the Kazekage's room. Outside in the hallwaywere three of the weirdest dressed teenagers Orochimaru had ever seen. The first one had his face painted and carried a large, hairy thing on his back. The second one was a girl, and had a giant fan strapped to her back and the third one, the boy, stared at him with emotionless eyes, and carried a large gourd on his back.

"Excuse me." Orochimaru said, as the the boy just stared at him. "Could you please move?" Orochimaru asked. By this time Orochimaru clearly was disappointed with the fact that he wasn't getting any respect, he was afterall - a kage. "Move it kid!" Orochimaru yelled, and with a slight movement, sand came from the boy's gourd and crushed Orochimaru's body.

"You didn't have to do that Gaara..." Temari said quietly, half hoping her brother heard her, half hoping he didn't. Instead of blood spilling from the crushed body, snakes just dropped to the ground, and behind Gaara, Orochimaru was walking away.

"You should be more polite when people tell you to move!" Orochimaru called, as he left to his village.

* * *

_In the Village of Mist..._

'How could he have been so careless!' Was all that Zabuza was thinking of, as he sat on a rock, watching his student train in the nearby lake. They were not alone though, there were two ANBU guards standing on either side of Zabuza. While his student Haku was using his bloodline to manipulate all the water in the lake, Zabuza couldn't help but think over the mistakes he made, resulting to his capture, and the uncomfortable position him and his student were in.

_Flashback_

Zabuza was chained to the chair, and his sword sat on the other side of the room. He was facing the man he had tried so hard to overthrow, defeat and kill, but of course the roles were reversed, and the man had captured him and was preparing to kill him. Not without a proposition first though.

"Momochi Zabuza!" The man smiled, leaning over to face him. "How happy am I to finally meet you again!"

"Mizukage." Zabuza spat out with hatred.

"That boy of yours is surely interesting!" The Mizukage smiled, pressing all of Zabuza's wrong buttons.

"If you lay your filthy hands on Haku then I'll -"

"You'll what Momochi?" The Mizukage asked. "Yell at me a bit more? As I was saying before, that boy is interesting. Killed two guards, injured three others, and now we have to have ANBU's guarding him around the clock! So, now for what I want from you. And the boy."

"His name is Haku." Zabuza said.

"Pardon?" The Mizukage raised an eyebrow.

"His name is Haku. And I'll do anything, just let the boy go. He's already lived a tough life, don't torture him further." Zabuza said.

"I was thinking the exact opposite actually." The Mizuage said, though Zabuza didn't trust him at all. "The fact is, I just want him to compete in a little thing called the Chunin exam. You'll be the Jounin captain of the team of course. And then once we're done with that, you can come back, live a normal life as a nin in the village, considering the fact that you won't cause anymore problems."

"What's the catch, and why?" Zabuza asked, it sounded too easy, anda bit strange for the decietful Mizukage.

"Sometimes you're too smart for your own good Zabuza." The Mizukage said. "But as you said, there are some 'extras'. I'll answer your first question. The reason is, our Genin haven't been doing well in the exams, and a genin as tallented as Haku, who has his own bloodline is just what the village needs to prove itself.This is our way of testing Haku."

"So the village is crap, boo hoo." Zabuza said, only to be punched in the face by the Mizukage. "Why are you testing Haku?" Zabuza said, sitting straight up again from the punch.

"We have acquired, let us say, a certain 'powerup' for a nin. It is very dangerous, but if we apply it to someone right then it will all work out."

"Why not give it to one of your lackeys standing at the door?" Zabuza replied, referring to the ANBU's guarding him and Haku.

"Because of two reasons. Firstly, Haku is still young, making him still have a lot of potential to become a powerful force for the village. And secondly, he has a bloodline, and a bloodline combined with the devestating force of a dem-" The Mizukage said, before catching himself. "I almost revealed it. But anyway, if Haku passes the Chunnin exam, then he will become one of the most poewrful Shinobi's to ever come from the Hidden Mist."

_'Don't worry Haku,' _Zabuza thought, _'I won't let them get to you, I'll find us a way to escape...' _

"And your part in this Zabuza." The Mizukage said. "Is to find two other teammates for Haku." The Mizukage smiled, before leaving the room and giving the ANBU's the signal to drag off Zabuza to his jail.

* * *

_Somewhere in the forests of the Village of Cloud_

"KAZEKEN! (Wind Fist)" Naruto called, punching with all his force. What he was punching at were five wooden poles, about half a metre apart. His punch contacted with the first wooden pole, creating a hole in it. Using his chakra he projected the punch, which then created a hole in the second, third, forth and fifth poles. This was not a test of strength, which was not needed much, but a test of his chakra control and ability to use his wind techniques. "Banzai!" Naruto cheered, as he finally completed his technique. "Itachi-nii-san I did it!"

"So that's your Taijutsu and Ninjutsu skills dones, where's the genjutsu?" Itachi asked. They had set a task for Naruto, since Naruto was wind type, he was told by Kazuma to make at least one Taijutsu, one Ninjutsu and one Genjutsu skill to do with wind.

"Genjutsu is hard! So I'm working on my second ninjutsu!" Naruto said, giving Itachi the thumbs up.

"I guess it would be okay to skip genjutsu with you, your not really a genjutsu specialist anyway." Itachi replied. "See if your jutsu could get through that tree over there." Itachi pointed to the nearby tree, as Naruto withdrew his sword.

"Futon : Kazedan No Jutsu!" Naruto called, making handseals on the hilt of the sword, and then swinging it, releasing three wind "bullets" that pierced three holes right through the tree. Staring at the holes he was aware of the effects of it on a real human being, after all he had experienced it first hand.

_Flashback - 2 Months Ago_

As a present to Naruto for completing his jutsu, Kazuma gave him some money to buy whatever he wanted from the nearby market. As happy as ever to get some new clothes, Naruto ran through the forest. Unknown to him, following close behind was Kazuma, who was always watching Naruto whenever he went out by himself. It was either Kazuma or Itachi that followed him, and being the stealthy individuals they were, they were undetectable to Naruto.

Being a market located on the border of Lightning Country, the shop owners made themselves the law, and did not care for whoever passed by their shops - whether they be a Shinobi, Missing-nin or normal traveller, as long as they just bought something. None of them bothered to stop the hyperactive blonde boy who was running threw the narkets cheering loudly, after all, he was buying their stuff. After spending hours at the market, almost too long for Kazuma, Naruto left happily with his bag of "goodies" mostly the useless junk that he just _had_to get no matter what the price was.

As he walked through the forest he was being followed, not only by Kazuma, but someone else. Naruto whistled his favorite song as he cheerfully skipped his way back to the Akatsuki hideout. And then Naruto heard the whiz of a kunai being thrown. Reacting quickly, Naruto dropped the shopping bags, and blocked the kunai with a quick whip of his sword. Facing infront of him was a long, brunette person, who's face was concealed by a ANBU mask. Looking on was Kazuma, who was observing what Naruto would do next.

"Where is the Akatsuki, and what do you know about Tsunami Ayame?" The ANBU nin asked, the voice confirmed Naruto's suspicions that it was a female.

"I don't know anything about this Akatsuki you're talking about, or whoever you're talking about!"Naruto replied, as the ANBU threw a kunai with her free hand, catching Naruto by surprise. Naruto's sword was made to be perfect for Naruto, made of a special metal that could absorb his large amounts of chakra - making it almost impenetrable. His sword sliced threw the kunai, but the ANBU tripped him up, and now was on top of him with a kunai to his neck.

"You're a bad liar." The ANBU replied, as her knee stabbed into his chest. Naruto deduced that this female was at least Chunin level, and was probably no older than 15.

"Or I could just make you believe I'm a bad liar so that you associate me with a cool group like the Akatsuki." Naruto gave his standard fox like grin.

"So you're lying about being a bad liar? And your bad lying is also another lie?" The ANBU replied, this boy had already begun to get her tongue tied, she was definetly _not _going to let him get away.

"If I'm lying about being a liar, while my bad lying is another lie - doesn't that mean I'm telling the truth?" Naruto smiled. He could practically feel the confusion coming from the ANBU. Itachi had taught him how to play mind-games, except Naruto's were a bit more 'fun'.Using her confusion as time Naruto managed to push her off his body, and they both resumed the standing position.

"No matter, there is confirmation that you are associated with Akatsuki." The female said.

"You seem pretty sure of yourself." Naruto said, raising his sword.

"You have moves of a Shinobi - a very bad one - yet you have no headband. You have great chakra control, yet no Shinobi clothes to classify rank. And of course, the rumours of a blonde boy from 11 to 13 years, accompanying the Akatsuki." The female was smiling under her mask. "There is also the file that identifies these charecteristics."

"I have a file?" Naruto grinned. "That is so cool. What else does it say? I'm extremely cool, powerful, superhumanly fast and others?"

"Your overconfident, weak, and the Akatsuki's main weakness." The female replied. "It doesn't really say that, but it will be added after I defeat you." It was one thing to call Naruto a bad liar, but he did_not _want to be called the weak point of Akatsuki.

_'Control yourself, kid." _The Kyuubi said within Naruto. _'Actually I don't know why I'm stopping you from such a good fight. Go kick her ass, and tell me when you need me.'_

_'Whatever." _Naruto replied, charging at the ANBU. She easily dodged his attacks, and managed to catch him off guard many times. His sword chopping managed to deplete her of most of her kunai and shuriken, and she started to move into a strange fighting stance. Her first punch was barely dodged by Naruto, as Naruto went for a slash to her chest. She ducked under his sword and smashed her foot into his chest, making him take a few paces back. Naruto knew all about female taijutsu users, overconfident, slightly psychotic, but still very powerful. He was going to use the over confidence to his advantage.

She did not pause for a second, and managed to strike a flurry of punches into Naruto, who was barely given time to dodge. With one last kick, he was sent to the ground.

"I guess he was as weak as I thought." The ANBU muttered to herself as she moved towards Naruto. She took out a kunai and went to walk over to him. Unknown to her, Naruto had begun on his handseals. When she was only a couple of metres away from Naruto, Naruto jumped up to deploy his jutsu.

"Katon : Gokakyuu No Jutsu!" Naruto called, sending a large fireball in her direction. She barely dodged it, her clothes and right arm were burned. What she didn't dodge, and couldn't see was the kunai whizzing threw the grass in her direction. But even though she didn't see it, she felt it stab into her leg. "You're too careless for an ANBU nin, who are you?"

"Suzuka Kyome." The female spat out, lying on the ground clutching her ankle. She would've thrown her kunai and shuriken at him but he had shattered them all with his sword. She ripped off her mask to reveal a pretty, brunette girl, with adisappointed expression on her face. "You are right, I am not an ANBU. I barely made it as a Chunin. I heard of an ANBU mission to hunt after Akatsuki, and since my brother was injured, I took his spot."

"You idiot!" Naruto yelled. "You would've died if you met the real Akatsuki! What made you think you could take them on?"

"It doesn't matter!" Kyome replied with a grin on her face. She held a small blackdevice in her hand that had a small red button on it. "If I press this button, the ANBU squads will come in to take you. Then they will kill the Akatsuki, and the traitor Ayame!"

Kazuma saw the button and new she was not joking, he didn't want to take over Naruto's fight, that would be just stomping on his pride. Naruto's only option to ensure his safety was to get the device from the girl, and kill her before she even got close to it. Destroying the device could probably set it off as well, so he had to also make sure the device didn't break. "Naruto! Finish her!" Kazuma called from the trees, distracting both the girl and Naruto.

The girl was shocked at the appearance of an Akatsuki that she dropped the device. It was too far away to grab, and Naruto was already making his move, so she begun her handseals.

"Doton : Doryuu No Jutsu! (Earth Release : Earth Dragon Technique)" She called, as a dragon made of Earth came from the ground. Since her chakra was automatically relocating to her ankle to help heal her, she couldn't use much chakra to make the jutsu, so it was much weaker than it would've been hadshe not been wounded. Naruto charged his sword with chakra and sliced threw the earth dragon, after all it was merely dirt, wood, and rock. He used the momentum of the swing to his advantage, and what would come next would be burned into Naruto's memory forever. He didn't expect it to happen, he didn't even want it to happen. But it did, and it wasn't a sight for his sore eyes.

"Futon : Kazedan No Jutsu!" Naruto called, forming the handseals on the hilt of his sword as he swung. The three wind bullets shot from the sword and sliced through the air. It didn't pause with her body either, creating three cleanly cut holes, that spurted out blood, splashing over Naruto. But admist all the blood, tears ran down Naruto's face, he never expected killing to be so hard, he always thought of the simple good guy vs. bad guy fights, but in reality - was he really a good guy? She was a nin from a village, does that make her the good guy? Do the bad guys have to proclaim themselves as evil to be bad? These questions were interrupted as Kazuma dropped from the tress onto the ground. Naruto fell to his knees crying, as Kazuma spoke.

"Karashi Yoshi." Kazuma said, looking at the depressed Naruto. "The first person I ever killed. Every time you do though, remember this Naruto. The world of the Shinobi is not easily seperated bygood and bad. People become Shinobi, knowing they have to kill, knowing the most likely chances of being killed in battle."

"Why?" Naruto asked, clutching Kyome's mask in his hands, looking over her lifeless body. "Why do we kill, what is the real purpose of Akatsuki?"

And Kazuma explained it. Everything.

_End Flashback_

From that day, Naruto would train as much as he could, as Itachi watched over carefully. Kisame walked over to his partner and began whispering into his ears.

"The Chunin exam is beginning in a month." Kisame began. "Orochimaru will be making his move against Konoha, he has gathered mercenary nins and missing nins for his village."

"What does Kazuma say we do?" Itachi asked.

"Naruto has been talking about it for weeks. And we could always use a spy in Konoha and Orochimaru." Kisame replied.

"And it would be a perfect chance for Naruto to get back at Orochimaru, and we will get our chance as well." Itachi said. "So we're seriously going to send him over, I thought Kazuma was just joking."

"Apparently Kazuma has already found a team for him. But we'll have to actually travel to the village to let him join."

"Areyou crazy? How do you expecta village to let us through?"

"You probably haven't heard of this village, Itachi. But it is..." Kisame whispered the name of the village into Itachi's ear.

"Everything seems much clearer." Itachi nodded. "What about Naruto's appearance?"

"I'll handle that." Kisame smiled, walking over to Naruto. "Naruto! It's time for your haircut!"

* * *

_Village of Sound, 1 week later._

"Bastards." Orochimaru growled from behind his office desk. For every kage Orochimaru had ever saw, they always had their own office desk, and Orochimaru wanted the same. Helooked at the three figures from behind his desk, a tall man, an avearge heighted teenager, and a young boy.

"So do we have a deal then?" The teenager asked.

"You guys are really assholes." Orochimaru said, slapping a Sound headband on the desk. "This is yours." And the two older men, who could not believe how easy it was to convince him disappeared. "So boy, what name are you using?" Orochimaru growled, filling out an application form.

"Na-" The boy caught himself, almost revealing his name. "Akuma."

"Nakuma?" Orochimaru asked, scribbling down the name. "And clan name?"

"Wait no!" The boy said.

"Just stick with the name! I only have a limited number of these forms. Clan name. Now!"

"Kazedan." The boy grumbled. "Kazedan Nakuma."

* * *

**This chapter took ages. I truly can't wait to begin writing the Chunin exam arc. I have a good idea of what the pairing for Naruto is going to be, and I thought I'd make it rather unique. I've read nice little one shots of the pairing but have hardly seen many in stories like this, so be suprised it could be anything! - except yaoi. **


	5. Chapter 5 : And So It Begins

**Apologies for the... lateness.. the super lateness...**

**Replies to reviews... Thanks for them btw...**

**Near-Sighted Byakugan User : The last name of Yondaime "Kazama" was created by someone as part of a fic and has spread out over almost every writer. But Kazuma, the Akatsuki leader and Yondaime are connected in my story. **

**The hero of time : Kazuma, Ayame, Shin and Ikkaku are the OC's in Akatsuki, Kyome and Hiryuu Kira are also OCs**

**Scienceboy : Kazedan is Naruto yeah, don't expect Naruto to be too overpowered though**

**For those of you who don't knowthe meaning of Naruto's false name Kazedan Nakuma here it is. Kazedan, which is alsothe name of his jutsu, means Wind Bullet, while his intended name of Akuma means Demon. **

* * *

**Chapter 5 : And So It Begins...**

The Village of Sound was crap. Or as Kisame described it a dull, unimaginative shit hole, with no sense of creativity when it was built. Besides the weird smell coming from what was the "best restaurant in the Village of Sound", the faulty power lines and the unfinished buildings, the Village was actually pretty well off for a newly created village. Naruto's expectations were of a dictatorship of Orochimaru, enemy nins being tortured in one building, armies of nins being trained which included the muscle-bound, ex-convict and downright ugly nins - and it was far from it, except for the ugly part. And that was no joke. The Village was a democracy of rejects, where missing-nin gathered and were welcomed with open arms. It was rather depressing, having all the "misfits" gather in one place. But Naruto thought that for such a village, the snake bastard had done rather good -it still didn't change the fact that he was still the snake bastard.

Somewhere in the depressing village, behind the building in which Orochimaru and Kabuto resided, bricks paved the large area, with no signs of trees or plants. Naruto scratched his spiky, black hair - yes it was black, as he, and six others, were being briefed about the Chunin exam by Orochimaru. Kazuma _made _Naruto get a haircut from Ayame, who managed to overpower the squirming boy and splatter the black dye all over his messy hair. According to Ayame herself nothing short of a powerful blast of water would get it out, so Naruto's attempts in the shower were futile. Naruto was sitting on the ground wearing his black Uchiha-styled shirt, in which the collar reached his mouth, with his trademark yellow swirl on the back. His black pants were full of shuriken and kunai, and around his waist was his long sword.

It only took him a couple of seconds to absorb and process the names and details of the six other nins. Among them was Akado Yoroi - the chakra absorber, Tsurugi Misumi - who could stretch his body, Dosu Kinuta - who wore a sound amplifier on his arm, Kin Tsuchi - a genjutsu user, Zaku Abumi - who created sound waves through holes in his hands and Yakushi Kabuto - the jounin-level medic nin.

"Zankuha!" The sound wave blasted itself from the holes in his hand, and straight at Naruto. It was a wide range jutsu, so all Naruto could do was jump as high as he could and attempt to block it with his sword. Naruto barely managed to block the attack, which caused him to lose his balance in mid-air, as he not so gracefully landed.

_"He's toying with Zaku..." _Orochimaru thought, watching the fight. From where he was standing he could tell Naruto, or "Nakuma", was testing Zaku's abilities, trying to see whether he could do any better. He organized the practice fight, as some hostilities had occured when Orochimaru announced that Naruto would be joining them, Zaku was displeased the most. And so the fight started, Zaku put his position in the team on the line, and if he lost, it would go straight to Naruto. Right now Zaku thought he was winning. _Thought._

_"Just a one-trick pony..." _Naruto easily dodged his attacks, after all he only had the one sound wave attack. It was good practice for Naruto's defensive taijutsu, but after a while it would get tiresome. He had learned how to predict Zaku's jutsu process, he would engage in Taijutsu, and when he decided he couldn't get a move in he would stop, pause, and use the "Zankuha". But something intrigued Naruto about the move, mainly because of the use of wind in the jutsu.

"If you haven't noticed, I've been toying with you this whole time." Rather than Naruto saying it, it was Zaku - much to the surprise of everyone else. "I've been waiting to bring out my new jutsu, to test it out on a weakling like you." Naruto couldn't help but smirk, currently Zaku was in worse shape than he was, but Naruto was still on guard nevertheless. Zaku's hands faced Naruto, there was the stop and pause. "Zankukyokuha!" The jutsu was a much larger blast of wind, lifting bits of the ground up at Naruto, serving as projectiles, besides the strong force of wind aswell.

"Kage Bunshin No Jutsu!" Naruto called, using the Bunshins as a shield for himself, the Jutsu didn't touch him. And then came the Taijutsu again. Apparently Zaku had only been taught one style of taijutsu, whereas most ninjas knew more, just incase the opponent was able to counter it. The pattern was, punch, punch, kick, punch, stop, pause - Zankuha or Zankukyokuha. Judging from the restraint of his attacks, Naruto guessed that it was Zankukyokuha, but he would never know, as Naruto used his finally strategy to end it. The first two punches were easily blocked by Naruto, the kick was dodged, and the last punch was interrupted by Naruto's sword. The stop and pause was left. With speed, as Zaku held his two hands out towards Naruto, Naruto put his sword in its hilt, appeared in front of Zaku, and pressed his hands against his.

"Kemurigakure No Jutsu!" Smoke came out of Naruto's hands, and clogged up Zaku's air holes - there would be no more air attacks anymore for Zaku. Naruto withdrew the sword from its hilt, jabbing Zaku in the stomach, doubling him over and towards the ground.

"Naruto wins!" Kabuto called from the sidelines, as Zaku was picked up by an unknown medic-nin and ushered away. Orochimaru didn't care much as Zaku was sent away, he never really had a connection with any of his disicples and he always thought that Zaku in particular was rude and had no respect for his superiors. All eyes were on Orochimaru as he walked in front of the remaining Genins, except for Kabuto who was only pretending.

"As of today you will all begin you're training as teams, for how you finish in the exam reflects on yourself as a nin." His voice radiated with authority, but truth-be-told, he didn't really care how any of them had finished, he had guessed the outcomes already. "But, besides the exams, all of you will have a mission to complete for me. Assasinate, Uchiha Sasuke." Orochimaru withdrew a photo of the said Konoha nin from his pocket, showing the Sound nins the black hair and eyes, and the trademark Uchiha shirt. "Remember this face." And with that, Orochimaru left, with Kabuto following closely behind.

"What's so special about him?" Dosu asked, preparing to train with Kin. Ofcourse, Naruto knew the answer to that question. If Orochimaru couldn't get the Sharingan from Itachi, he would have to get it from his little brother. Without a word, Naruto departed aswell. "Oi! Shouldn't you train aswell?"

"Maybe later." Naruto replied, walking off. The streets were littered with stalls selling apparently "cursed items" and "priceless jewels", but Naruto was told not to believe any of that stuff. Kisame had told Naruto his sword was getting old, so Naruto had to go look for a new one by himself. As he walked through the marketplace, a certain stall caught his eye. Swords were crammed around the sides, hanging from the top, on the desk, practically begging to get attention from any swordsman or anyone that passed by.

"Hey boy! You like swords?" The old man asked, he was speaking a very broken english, using only words that were necessary. "I have lots swords. Pick whatever please you!" Naruto had to stop and think for a second to decipher what he wsa saying, but he began his search throught the many swords. The one that caught his eye was a strange design, it looked like a normal katana, around 2 to 3 feet long, the blade must have been painted black. The hilt of the sword was yellow, but extending from it was a long chain.

"If I sell this sword, may I also buy a wakizashi to accompany it?" Naruto laid down his old sword, and some cash. The wakizashi Naruto wanted was probably about one and a half feet long, the blade was painted white, and a white ribbon came from the hilt.

"How you know?" The man asked, to which Naruto raised an eyebrow.

"How did I know what, sir?" Naruto said as politely as possible.

"You found sword partner..." The old man leaned in, as if telling a precious secret. "When sword and partner used properly, powerful jutsu is made." Naruto balanced the two swords in his hands, to Naruto, they felt good. "I sell it for just that old sword." The old man took Naruto's old sword, and once again stopped Naruto as he began to walk away. "You know how to use sword with chain?" Naruto stopped, looked at the man, and honestly out of all the styles of weapon use Kisame and Ayame had told him, "Sword With Chain" style was not one of them.

"Can you teach me?" Naruto asked.

"I teach for one week." The old man and Naruto shook hands, and began his training.

* * *

_1 Week Later..._

In the one week Naruto learned how to throw the sword, and with help from the Kyuubi extend his chakra long enough to reach the full length of the sword and control it. According to the old man, who never really told Naruto his name, the trick to mastering what was called Tensa Zanjutsu, the "Chains Of Heaven Sword Technique", was chanelling your chakra through the chain to control it. Naruto could only learn the basics of the technique because that was all the old man knew, so Naruto was left with the two swords to develop his own sword style from there. And now Naruto was on his way to the Chunnin exam, there was only one problem with the trip though.

Naruto hated snakes. If there was any animal he'd be happy to live without, it would be snakes. Though they did prove useful for food when in the desert, they weren't so fun when an evil genius had accidentally left some in your pillow case - with an intention to kill your proclaimed mentor. And yet, Naruto found himself riding on one. A giant one. The size was cool, and the fact that Shinobis could summon these massive beasts left Naruto awestruck, but the giant snakes freaked the hell out of Naruto.

"Don't think about snakes, don't think about snakes..." Naruto repeated to himself, trying to set his mind of the giant snake whose back he was sitting on. He couldn't see from where he was sitting, but he was damn sure the snake was grinning, and even if the snake wasn't - Orochimaru was. Orochimaru had suddenly changed to a younger, but still as creepy, Jounin as part as his disguise for the Chunnin exam. Naruto thought it was stupid at first for Orochimaru to return to his old village, but now he had seen his plan fall into place, it would be simple and easy, but Naruto was sure that the Sound didn't have enough nins.

"Is he still repeating that same sentence?" Kin, the black haired kunoichi said to her bandaged teammate.

"It's pretty funny from where I'm standing, and I'm sure Orochimaru-sama is getting some pleasure out of this." Dosu, the other member of Naruto's temporary team for the Chunnin exam. They were alright, Naruto didn't mind Kin, but Dosu had a bad habit of thinking that he was the leader of the group, thus making him better than Naruto.

"Not all of us are lucky to have our ears covered by bandages like you, Dosu." Naruto called out, to Dosu, who was standing beside him, next to Orochimaru.

"Stop talking!" Orochimaru called, raising a hand. "This is the closest we can get to the village, we'll get the rest done on foot, let's go!" The snake disappeared underneath them and Naruto, Dosu, Kin and Orochimaru gracefully landed on the ground.

"This is going to be a long day..." Naruto sighed.

* * *

"Let's see our contestents for this year..." The Hokage smiled to himself, opening the applications for the Chunin exam. He loved the exams, the secrecy and the fact that only he, the Hokage, was allowed to know this information. The Hokage took out the first application, and stared in glee as it turned out to be one of Konoha's prized student, and this year's favorite - Uchiha Sasuke. 

_Name : Sasuke  
Age : 13  
Clan : Uchiha  
Clan Specialties : Sharingan  
Signature Jutsu : Katon : Gokakyuu No Jutsu_

The application showed other details, such as height, weight, date if birth and reasons of why he is participating in the exam and why he wants to be a ninja. The open questions would be important as there would be some psychologist examining them, as the answers would affect the exam in total itself. He flipped over the next application, showing one of the few mystery nins that had entered this year.

_Name : Nakuma  
Age : 13  
Clan : Kazedan  
Clan Specialties : -  
Signature Jutsu : -_

The application form for "Nakuma" showed little information, and the one sentence answers to the open ended questions provided hardly anything for the psychologist to analyse. They considered declining his application, though it was decided to let him in in the end. Suddenly, a Chunnin burst intio the Hokage's room, he was sweating, and looked like he might faint.

"What is it?" The Hokage was annoyed by the interruption, but if it was this urgent, it had to be something big.

"We're not sure, but our group was coming back from a mission, and we saw a giant snake coming towards the village!" The man said between breathes, trying to get in as much air as possible.

"A giant snake?" The Hokage looked out of the window, and onto the village, he had view of the village gates, and saw a genin team with their Jounin Sensei walk into the village. "We have no time for it. We need your team watching the gates for anything suspicious, for now we have to pretend nothing happened as our guests have arrived."

* * *

Naruto entered a village which he had not seen in a long time, taking in all the sights. Dosu, Kin and Orochimaru as a Jounin followed behind, as they made their way to the hotel. 

"Once we get to the hotel I'll leave you guys there." Orochimaru said. "The exam starts in three days, and remember, I will be watching." When they reached the hotel Orochimaru disappeared, Kin mouthed something along the lines of "creepy" and Dosu coughed something that sounded alot like "pedophile." And then Naruto looked around, two beds in their room.

"Shotgun my own room!" Naruto grinned.

"Baka, there is no other room..." Kin brought her hand down towards Naruto's head, but Naruto tilted his head to the left to dodge it.

"WHAT!" Naruto yelled so loud that the other people in the hotel could here.

"You did remember to give your money to Orochimaru to pay for the hotel right?" Dosu asked, as Naruto looked like he was about to explode.

"The Snake-Bastard didn't say a thing..."

"No!" Kin said to Naruto, as he stared at her and winked. "No way you're sleeping with me... That came out wrong..." Naruto decided that he could either sleep on the floor, or find somewhere else to stay. Without a word he ran and jumped out of the 20 story window.

"Ah crap..." Naruto forgot how high up they really were, and just wanted to impress Kin and Dosu by having a cool exit not judging the consequences. Chanelling chakra through his wakizashi he stabbed it into the building, holding on as he dangled from the ground, about 10 stories up. Taking out his katana he tied the end of the chain to the wakizashi and threw the sword down, so it attached itselft to the roof of a smaller building. Climbing down the chain and onto the other roof, with one tug his wakizashi returned to his hand and he put the two swords in their sheaths, tied to his waist. Naruto jumped off the building, and as luck would have it he landed in front of the place he was looking for. Ichiraku Ramen. Little did he know he would not get a chance to eat there due to complications.

Walking down the street was Nara Shikamaru, the genius nin who had a powerful mind to observe everything, forget nothing and create strategies in a split second. Suddenly he bumped into Naruto, and Naruto was the first to apologize.

"Sorry Shikamaru-kun." And then Naruto realised what he just said. One word flowed through his mind "Shit". And the Kyuubi couldn't help laughing, as it echoed through his mind.

"Excuse me?" Shikamaru asked, he had caught every word the black haired boy standing in front of him said. "Do I know you?"

"No!" Naruto overexagerrated the no, but Shikamaru decided it was good enough and that delving further into it was "troublesome". "But I see you're going cloud gazing again..." The second time the word "Shit" flowed through his mind, and the Kyuubi was practically rolling in his cage with laughter.

"Yes I am... Naruto-san." Shikamaru had guessed right, his mind was able to take in everything and that included faces, especially the one of his old friend from his childhood.

"Shit, Shikamaru-san please don't tell anyone!" Naruto said, as he saw Shikamaru contemplating on it. "If you tell everyone they'll start bothering you for more and more information and then people will start demanding answers to questions about me and that will be - troublesome..." Naruto knew how to persuade his friend, who simply shrugged.

"Fair enough. Well, I'm going to go look at clouds..." Shikamaru shrugged once again, and Naruto followed him.

"You reckon I could stay at your house?" Naruto asked. Naruto like Shikamaru for two reasons, 1 - He was lazy, just like Naruto and 2 - He didn't ask questions unless they were absolutely necessary.

"You know my mother Naruto, she's a Nazi when it comes to these things so the answer is - no. But I do know of somewhere you can stay..." Shikamaru chuckled, Naruto did not like that chuckle. Naruto would find himself staring at the "Help Wanted" sign at a certain flower shop, and with that Shikamaru left him. A tall blonde man came out of the shop.

"I see you're interested in our help wanted sign!" The man said.

"Yeah, I'm staying here for the Chunin exam and I need somewhere to stay..." Naruto said, to which the man nodded.

"Earn your keep here and we'll give you our spare room, let me come inside and ask you a couple of questions first." Naruto followed the blonde man into the house, and thus his journey for the Chunin Exam begun. And it was going to be a difficult one.

* * *

**Sorry again for the late update, next chapter the Chunin exam will begin, as Naruto gets settled into his new home, and I've added in a couple of new people in the exam - my character Kira and ofcourse Haku. **

**Well, till next chapter (which I hope will take shorter thant his one did...)**


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